Theme 65 - Irony

From @swordfish19: Ironies abound. An eraser is manufactured to clean up after a pencil. The eraser owes its life to the pencil. However, from the moment it’s born, slow and certain erosion starts which eventually culminates into non-existence.  That which is the cause of life also results in the taking away of life. Ironies abound. Look around.

From @roshd: Boy meets girl and falls in love. Thoughts of her drive him crazy. He would do anything for her, even marry her. He proposes. She demurs. She’s not sure of his commitment. She has been hurt before. And actually both want the same thing. If it’s meant to be, love will find it’s own way.

From @gauravjagwani: He kept falling prey to that bottle of wine. He had it in him to beat it. However, he never did last more than three weeks sober. His problem wasn’t serious for rehab. But, he was no lightweight either. He stayed a whole month sober. To celebrate his new high, he poured himself a glass.

From @n0rwegianw00d: 

Incessant rains had lashed the city since morning. But Rameshwar was a happy man. He had worked hard to ensure that the drainage system was in top condition. This year, there will be no complaints. With a big smile, he left for office.

His phone rang. “Rameshwar, where are you?”

“Sir, my society is flooded.”

From @IndianIdle: He was geek from his childhood. He fancied superheros and their suits. Always wanted to be like them and shine in the glitz and glamor. He grew up to achieve his dream, and got that nearly too. Now he also built the suit. And Ironed them in his shop. His friends called him 'Irony Man'. 

From @dasCapital_: 

The nuclear bomb destroyed  Loki’s army alright, but he landed on another planet. Paralysed neck down and thinking of a way out, some kids came near him and inspected him. 

“Let’s make him into a toy. Looks irony enough.”

“Irony!! Bah.”  So thought Iron Man and started waiting for Hulk to come and rescue him.

From @teejavus: She could never trust anyone, life has always been unfair. He seemed nice but she could never understand why. She whispered her fears into in his ears. Faced him, "Is it clear ?", she asked . "As clear as mud", he said. She was blind from birth. She tugged at him. He kissed her. She smiled; blissfully. 

From @madhavisud: We all know Life isn't fair, but did we know it is full of irony? I always wanted to work in the Finance Domain. Finally, when the opportunity knocked my glass cabin door, I had long lost interest, due to my own confusions, and accepted it reluctantly. I can deal with unfair!! What about irony??

From @chinmaynaik07: 

She had wanted him to love her. Madly.
Now he does.
However, it is too late.
She is hurt and has retreated to her old world. She only wants to be with her friend in him right now.
But his love has only grown.
And now they can’t be, because he loves her too much.

From @anjana_murali: He had lost it all finally, the splendour, the wealth, the princedom when his elder brother had returned from the dead. The irony was that the girl he had loved but not married because of his greediness and her commoner status had been his brother’s saviour- now the princess as his lawfully wedded wife.

From @bitchwanti: Everyday she laughs when she types "angel" in her email id. Her innocent face once gave her nick name. "Bitchwanti",she keys in on the user name slot of twitter. That's when the irony hits her.

From @Crucifire: 

“WHERE IS MY WHITE SHIRT?”
“IRONING IT, DONT SHOUT!”
Power goes off.

“I WILL SAVE YOU!”, a caped crusader breaks in through the window.
“I am IRONYman”
“IRON MAN? In MY home?”
“No no IRONYman. Lady, my cape got creased while coming in, could you please iron it?”

*WHACK*

From @Realfartshady: 

"Did you see that new deal on tv yesterday?"

"Yep, I did."

"Says we can get internet for 20$ a month!"

"Ain't it sweet."

"So, should we get it?"

"Hell, alright. How?"

"They say 'order online'."

"What’s ‘online’?"

"Fuck if I know!"

From @sarwarbaig: "We armed them and funded their war because we wanted them to thwart our enemy's attempts to gain a foothold in the region. We cheered them on. They grew to hate us for other reasons and hit us unexpectedly and catastrophically. Now we've been bombing them for eleven years to bring them freedom."

From @writingchalk: After years of battling with cancer, she was at peace. Relatives poured in grieving, offering condolences. Her 5-year old daughter was blank. She took the picture of a crab to her father, “Daddy, if this made mommy sick I want to beat it up.” In the midst of this gloom, everyone managed a little smile.

From Ruby: Finally the moment had arrived. He kissed on her forehead while she was taken to labor room.  After all it was a much awaited moment after 10 years for them. Shelley had planned loads of things for her unborn. Even the name was decided. Apparently the doctors could not save her. Irony of fate.

From @madrasmad: He was born to open. Politics and jealousy kept him out of district, state and national cricket teams, but he was one of the best openers that critics knew. He later worked as a bartender for a few years, but kept forgetting to close those bottles. Today, Unlockeshwar Reddy works as a toll-gate operator.

From @_Nehu: Famous social worker, his job was to save girl child. He wanted world with no dowry, no sati, no rape… He worked for women empowerment. Every night he sits beside her daughter(Photo) and proudly tells success story with tears.Irony of his life 10years back his daughter was burnt to death for dowry.

From @HighHeelsWaali: Her son had done nothing wrong. She was so sure of it. There had to be a mistake. Her blood could not be a rapist and a murderer. The girl must be to blame. That shameless tart.
She conveniently forgot that the girl was of her blood too. 

From @akshayabansal: His dearest friend had a deep scar on his face. Fate, their families separated during the air raids. Often, he wondered about his friend. Now, 30 years later, a man stood before him. Same scar, different name. His unmistakable smile was the giveaway. How ironic! For I was to send him away again.. 'Life imprisonment!' 

From @mydirtylinen: I could stare into your eyes forever, but the heat between your legs beckons. I could lazily run my tongue down your thigh but I must taste you now. I could whisper sweet nothings in your ear, but I love having you moan for me. I could do this all night, but I ache for you.

From @miffalicious: They called him the brave warrior, the fearless leader of a ruthless tribe. Strapping lad with his broad shoulders, huge, rippling muscles and furrowed eyebrows. Yet, he had a strange habit of avoiding the sunshine, to the curiosity of his tribespeople. What they didn't know was, he was afraid of his own shadow, you see. 

From @hilonee: Each year she worked harder than the previous believing she would make it. But her belief proved wrong for 3 consecutive years. She decided it was now or never. She rehearsed day in and day out. Non-stop. Her hard work earned her the coveted seat. The mental and physical stress earned her dysphonia. Ah! The irony!

From @vishalshriyan: His brow was furrowed with the absolute concentration only a child could have. He ran his finger along the doctor's report which finally identified that thing he suffered from. He had thought what ailed a seven year old would have a simple name. Ironically it was the hardest word he had ever read. Dyslexia.

From @ghaatidancer: They'd vowed never to make promises. They'd discussed polygamy. They'd gone on 'breaks' to 'figure things out'. They'd both had dirty little secrets. They'd sworn never to speak of commitment. They lived together, separate, yet as one. They were the only ones who really lasted.

From @rumna: We yearned for the land of milk and honey. We wanted it all, generous salaries, a Mercedes parked in front of the town house, a summer home in Maine, wild parties with exotic food, rich wines. We have it all now, yet pine for love, warmth, family, friends who matter, a wish to belong again.

From @aaroo4: “ADULTERY”-  Yippee.. Oh wait,  i get only  9 measely points. Cmon, pick up the missing tiles already, i am going to play my turn.. watch out. “MARRIAGE” – Gosh, i wonder how many points that is… 1..3..6.. 9..10, dang only 10 points. Oooh, my turn already? Nice… Here it comes…
“IRONY”  ha-ha.. How about that!. Ouch!

From @randomWhiz: 

'We guard you for your safety.'
'There is a big bad world out there.'
'The people out there want to do bad things to you.'

Just when she was pondering about all the above, her uncle slipped in and locked the door from within. Her prison of safety doesn't guard against the inmates, apparently.

From @melittlepixie: After a heated argument, Adrian was slapped by his step-father. On an impulse, Adrian spat on him, kicked him in the groin and walked away. When he returned home, his mother was hysterical. ‘Adrian! How could you spit on him, you son-of-a-bitch?’, she screamed. Adrian smiled. His mother never saw the irony of calling him that. 

From @dhavalmehtas: Although he had had great opportunity in b'lore choose Bombay...he pays visit to her home,almost every weekends ...he had something to tell her..but failed everytime. "Thank-you" she said... "For what??" he asked "Your support..and you suppose to be Congratulate me first" she said. he didn't understand.."I am engaged....." she said.

From @sausagetangdi: Sleep with them to control your sexual desires, bathe with them to attain Bhramacharya. Don't talk to them to refrain emotional attatchement and you shall reach a stage of self actualization,the most important in psychology. He told his followers, fellow human beings bound to cheat. Ironically, the father of a developed nation,to be. 

From @Oxymoronic_Me: Satisfied, the man looked around him. The house looked beautiful now. He remembered how decrepit it had been a month back. He had scraped it, filled the cracks, smoothened it and colored it brown. He turned to the owner and returned the house keys. It was time to go home. Back to his thatched hut. 

From @Sychlops: 

It was epic.
Just the prospect of it.
A superhero who didn't like being called superhero.
A super-villain who used to be a super hero.
Marvel vs DC.
Iron Man vs Magneto.
They'd stick together for ever.
Cancelling each other out.
They had Superpowers.
But the Laws of Magnetism still applied.
Ironical.

From @philusophur:

The irony was the same fullmoon and the same enraged feeling called love. Only this time, backed-up with fanaticism.

' I love you, the same way, I always have...Deep, Pure and Mad. and if you can't be mine, I won't let you be anyone else's. '

The butcher had his advantage.

' Maybe next-time. '

From @anushreekejriwa: He was a successful man in terms of work and money. The world was at his feet. He married the girl whom he dearly loved and was blessed with a beautiful daughter. He didn't have time for the angel, when he retired he was in a quandary; ironically then his daughter didn't have time.

From @kunalbaidmehta: Growing up in a middle class family with limited means had made Michal stingy. This nature of his caused a lot of stress in his marriage to a girl who liked to live the good life. Michal has changed now and he indulges and pampers himself often. Ironically, this change happened after May left him.

From @vivekisms: It was supposed to last. The forevers had to be achieved. It was promised after all. So they should have stuck to it? Love is forever. Love is eternal. Love is meant to be. They outgrew love.